It's because, at the moment, I'm getting a rather weird message from the "rape is rape" brigade. I'm getting two things: Every single time I'm about to have sex, even with an established partner, I *must* get verbal consent to penetrative sex. Otherwise she is perfectly entitled to decide it's rape and she never gave consent. This also rules out early morning sex. A bit of a pain, since I've known a few girlfriends over time who have loved being woken up like that occasionally.
Lets set up a hypothetical...
I've met a girl, we've had sex a couple of times with no worries. We joke, we chat, we eat, we go to bed ... you know ... normal relationship stuff. I sleep over, and in the morning wood, decide to see if I can carry on where we left off last night. Of course she wakes pretty quick, but it's lazy and nice, and we chat, have breakfast, I leave ... As far as I know .. We had a nice time.
Now she decides a day or two later to go to the police and tell them she didn't consent to that sex in the morning. True. She didn't. But does that make me a rapist?
I know "rape is rape" love to see things in black and white, but isn't intent also involved here? If the intent is to have a nice morning and leave a smile on a face, even if a misunderstanding does occur and she later decides "actually I wish that hadn't happened" ... If I've had no signal of lack of consent before, during and after ... No chance to stop because she said "stop" ... Am I a rapist?
The worrying thing is .. according to the hysterical and well meaning messages in support of rape victims I keep seeing on Twitter. Yes. Actually. That would make me a rapist.
I'm not buying it so much. The hysteria of black vs white thinking isn't allowing any sane debate over what's reasonable and what isn't.
If anyone does read this ... I bet I get called a "rape apologist" in seconds flat.
This brings up a second point I've seen scroll past: Apparently, me saying "I've been there and witnessed the damage rape has done to a girl first hand and I utterly hate it". Is inexcusable in the new climate. Apparently that's me justifying my "rape apologist" attitude. That seems utterly bonkers to me.
I've actually been able to testify in court to help convict a rapist and been damn proud of it! ... I guess mentioning that makes me an even worse monster for hiding my rape apologist attitude behind the poor girl's suffering or something?
Uhm. Hang on. Why is the alleged rape apologist proud of helping to convict a rapist exactly? Just WTF level 10 right there!
The ability to discuss this issue rationally is dangerously close to vanishing entirely. It's even managing to make me fall out with people I share in general very similar anti-rape views with! What the hell is going on people? When did we loose sanity and the ability to question and discuss? When did it become a culture based entirely on accusation and hate?
It's very sad and very worrying.
To bring it full circle and back to Assange:
As far as I'm aware (and I've read the testimony's) two girls went to the police a day or so after Assange was with them. One of the girls refused to complete and verify her testimony. The other was interviewed on the phone later. Her testimony was later edited after she verified it. Having issued an arrest warrant for Assange on this basis, within hours ... another higher power checks the statements and retracts the arrest warrant and rape charges. Something along the lines of "sexual misdemeanour" remains as a possible charge. It's not "A serious sexual assault" as the BBC will repeat loudly at you.
So...
I'll ask you again all of you that have already decided Assange needs to face serious sexual assault allegations in Sweden ... What the fuck are you talking about? And why won't you look at the facts for yourselves? You're buying in to hysteria, denying the ability for anyone to discuss it rationally, and accusing people of being rape apologists left right and centre for pointing out that in this particular case, it's not that simple.
And one final point that virtually no one wants to consider:
*IF* the charges against Assange have been cooked up under political pressure? Then that does a sh*tload of damage to the reputation of every single woman who has been raped and wants to report it. Probably the worst scenario of all, because by US pressure kicking up rape accusations to snatch a whistle-blower, you've ended up with this whole mess of argument, accusation and bad feeling, accused people of being rape apologists who might actually be talking sense on this one, possibly produced inflated false charges to get one man, and turned the rape hysteria dial up to max.
All thanks ... to the US wanting to gut Assange. Yet. I'm the guy putting rape victims in a bad light?
I'll leave you with this:
To bring it full circle and back to Assange:
As far as I'm aware (and I've read the testimony's) two girls went to the police a day or so after Assange was with them. One of the girls refused to complete and verify her testimony. The other was interviewed on the phone later. Her testimony was later edited after she verified it. Having issued an arrest warrant for Assange on this basis, within hours ... another higher power checks the statements and retracts the arrest warrant and rape charges. Something along the lines of "sexual misdemeanour" remains as a possible charge. It's not "A serious sexual assault" as the BBC will repeat loudly at you.
So...
I'll ask you again all of you that have already decided Assange needs to face serious sexual assault allegations in Sweden ... What the fuck are you talking about? And why won't you look at the facts for yourselves? You're buying in to hysteria, denying the ability for anyone to discuss it rationally, and accusing people of being rape apologists left right and centre for pointing out that in this particular case, it's not that simple.
And one final point that virtually no one wants to consider:
*IF* the charges against Assange have been cooked up under political pressure? Then that does a sh*tload of damage to the reputation of every single woman who has been raped and wants to report it. Probably the worst scenario of all, because by US pressure kicking up rape accusations to snatch a whistle-blower, you've ended up with this whole mess of argument, accusation and bad feeling, accused people of being rape apologists who might actually be talking sense on this one, possibly produced inflated false charges to get one man, and turned the rape hysteria dial up to max.
All thanks ... to the US wanting to gut Assange. Yet. I'm the guy putting rape victims in a bad light?
I'll leave you with this:
Released on 2012-02-28 15:00 GMT
| Email-ID | 389793 |
|---|---|
| Date | 2010-12-10 03:34:36 |
| From | mongoven@stratfor.com |
| To | morson@stratfor.com, defeo@stratfor.com, pubpolblog.post@blogger.com |
A hero?
Avaaz is right. It's not illegal but it does make you accessory to being
an asshole. Real people are being tortured by governments that Avaaz and
Assange probably like more than the US, all the while the two of them
denounce US 'torture' at Guantanamo.
They are like the crazy IPS/CISPES/SDS people who were so full of hate
that they could not see that they are doing so much more bad than they at
doing good.
I'm in favor of using whatever trumped up charge is available to get this
guy and his servers off the streets. And I'd feed that shit head soldier
to the first pack of wild dogs I could find.
Or perhaps just do to him whatever the Iranians are doing to our sources
there.
Avaaz is right. It's not illegal but it does make you accessory to being
an asshole. Real people are being tortured by governments that Avaaz and
Assange probably like more than the US, all the while the two of them
denounce US 'torture' at Guantanamo.
They are like the crazy IPS/CISPES/SDS people who were so full of hate
that they could not see that they are doing so much more bad than they at
doing good.
I'm in favor of using whatever trumped up charge is available to get this
guy and his servers off the streets. And I'd feed that shit head soldier
to the first pack of wild dogs I could find.
Or perhaps just do to him whatever the Iranians are doing to our sources
there.
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